Miss USA a Muslim? How much more sickening can you get?

Thanks for the help with dawa!!! I so look forward to the questions I'll receive from non-muslims and the looks that imply we abandon our beliefs. Of course they can't take us seriously if we can't portray a strong front.

I so appreciate Sr Hena's article, but can I just say....when did we become liberal and conservative Muslims? Is that what the Prophet, sAaws, used to describe us? Is it the path one chooses in order to find the easiest or hardest route? Since when did Muslims turn political instead of just following the Quran and the Sunnah of the Prophet, sAaws?

I Cannot Cheer You on Sister Rima Fakih, Miss USA 2010: Too Much at Stake

by Hena Zuberi

As a Muslim woman, who is passionate about the using the best of our abilities to make this world a better place alongside our men, I cannot cheer you on Rima Fakih, Miss USA 2010; too much is at stake. I detested beauty pageants when I didn’t wear hijab, and detest them when I do now. I wish you had used your “passion, courage, and self-confidence” for a better cause.

People do stuff, it gets reported in the papers, the end. But when blogs, Muslim magazines here and all over the world have commentaries that celebrate this as a Muslim victory then it is too much. Even “Muslim feminists,” like Fatemah Fakhraie of Muslimah Media Watch, who normally think beauty pageants are “gross” because of their “history of sexism, exploitation and exclusion” are excited. So sister if one of our own does it, its ok? Talk about letting go of your values.

Fakhraie asks, “Why would any self-respecting feminist cheer at the fact that a Muslim woman has been objectified along with the rest of the Miss USA contestants?” She answers herself, “because she is excited about seeing another female face of Islam in the mainstream media. Rima Fakih is another representation: she doesn’t look like the headscarf-wearing Muslim women usually profiled in human-interest stories (the ones who open their own businesses or are fired from Abercrombie & Fitch stores). She doesn’t look like the war-torn women of Iraq or Afghanistan–representations in the media that Americans are used to seeing.”

Even if she has to agree that that “Rima’s crown represents sexist ideals and expectations…As a media activist and Muslim feminist, I am fully aware of these issues, and I know that her victory is not a real one for Muslim women or Arab American women.”

If you believe that the victory is not a real one then why applaud it? Have we lost all sense of identity that we have to rejoice at a Muslim woman stripping down to her undies as a breakthrough in Arab/Muslim acceptance in this country? Are we so desperate for any “good” publicity that we will take the bottom of the barrel? My Arab ancestors must be turning over in their graves somewhere. This is not a triumph for any self-respecting Muslim/woman who upholds true feminist beliefs.

“Muslims are moving up,” says a Berkeley brother who identifies as a “liberal”. Trying to make sense of the celebration, Janan Delgado adds in a solid piece onaltmuslimah, “Seeing that one of us gets to make it in spite of being Muslim and Arab is another welcome relief.”

I wonder too, how can people think this is making it? What does that mean? If making it means pandering to the ogling crowds of the lowest of low males- like cattle or cars are paraded, being judged on the size of their undergarments. This is wrong on so many levels as an American, as a Muslim, a parent, a teacher and as an immigrant.

Delgado further points out (Jazakillah khair sister): “We are integrated! We can be Muslim and get to do the things other Americans do! We also get to have our bodies paraded like horses at expensive Vegas casinos! Hurray! Except, of course, that when this happens, women like Rima who agree to appear in tiny bikinis are cast as the progressive ones [CNN actually used this word]. In the meantime, those of us who cover up head to toe are contrasted to these beacons of progress, in hopes that one day we see the light as well, and shed off our scarves, and while at it, perhaps all the rest as well.”

Rima, herself is quoted as saying, “I think it would prove that Arabs don’t always try to separate themselves, but instead are integrated into American culture,” she recently told the Global Arab Network.

“What are we doing? We are saying here we are and we are naked like you,” says Sarah Siddiqui, while celebrating her JD from the University of Arizona Law School where she was the Articles editor of their Law Review. ” This is going to change our image, I don’t think so. Most people will look at her and think this is one (anomaly), this is not a typical Muslim.”

“Perhaps a pretty girl like Rima Fakih in a shiny bikini will help dispel the ominous rumors and generate interest in, or at least Google searches on, Islam.” What?! Is this what we are going to do for dawah- strip and spread? An article in Elan the magazine for global Muslim culture says “You go, girl. One small step for a Muslimah, one giant leap for Muslim-kind, as we go from being stereotyped as hairy/angry/terrorists to hot/giggling/beauty queens. I love it”, read Elan’s article.

We need to celebrate another stereotype? Don’t we get a choice about who represents us- it has to be terrorists or winner of beauty pageants? This is an insult to all Muslimahs who are working hard in their respective fields, becoming scholars, lawyers, designers, chefs, professors, doctors, engineers, writers, business women, scientists, teachers and mothers. They struggle everyday to establish themselves, to build the Muslim image despite what Americans see on TV everyday.

“First Muslim Winner of Miss USA,” announces the Guardian’s headline. This is not an achievement of literary, athletic or scientific pursuit to be celebrated at Pita Pits around the country and the Arab world. It is a fact that she is an immigrant of Lebanese descent but do not make this about her Islam. Just as no mention is made of the Ms. Oklahoma, the runner-up’s religion, lets leave the Muslim out of it. When Ashwayria Rai won Ms. World- she was celebrated as an Indian, not a Hindu. Do you know which religion Vanessa Williams, the first African-American Ms. USA practices? Probably not. Read Ahmed rehab’s article in the Chicago Tribune

She wants to be a babe in a bikini then let it be just that, don’t make her the unwilling representative of Muslim women.

I am not saying Muslim women all around the way dress the same way or Muslim women have not dressed this way before. From singers in Arab countries to Pakistani models (some college buddies from Kinnaird are supermodels now) do dress like that but they don’t have headlines in respected papers like the Guardian calling them first MUSLIM anything- they are just singers or models from whatever country. Nor are they being asked in Newsweek to address Muslim women issues and “visit France as a good-will ambassador. She should bring her bikini.”

Making this about her religion, gives our girls the wrong role model to look up to. I am dreading the moment when one of my kids will get congratulated for a Muslim winning the pageant. That will stop my “Muslims don’t do that” line stone cold. When I tell my daughter that Hannah Montana (Miley Cyrus) may do certain things because she is a non- Muslim, what do I tell her now? Maybe I will tell her the same thing I told her when suicide bombers blew my uncle and nephew up while praying Jumu’ah in Rawalpindi, “that they are not following Islam.” It felt lame then and it feels lame now.

I know sex and all that is sexy sells and that’s what people are into but Muslim teens need stronger Muslim women highlighted in other fields, whose behavior they can emulate. This is why for years I drove the extra 35 miles so my daughters could see their Muslimah pediatrician, she didn’t wear hijab but dressed modestly and would greet them with salaam. They look at her and say, “hey I could do that.”

When Tanya from the youth group asks me ‘Sister Hena, but she is the first MUSLIM isn’t that cool?’ Is it cool? I attend a very liberal masjid, I can see where the girls are going with that – ‘everyone is doing it now even Muslims,’ ‘This opens up door which hasn’t been opened before, and sometimes that is not good’, says Sarah Ahmed, a mother of four college kids.

I am going to call it the David Chappelle syndrome, he cussed, is famous and is Muslim and, so there is a stream of comedians of Muslim backgrounds, who started off innocently but now are on mainstream media cussing away. What is amazing about Brother Chapelle is that quit his 50 million dollar show because of his increasing spirituality, this fact our young brothers ignore. It doesn’t matter that Rima is smart or wants to become a lawyer- she is hot and famous that is the focus.

Living in Los Angeles, I have seen the Kim Karadashian effect. It was bad enough when cheering the acceptance of petite bodies, long dark hair, naturally tanned skin as beautiful and mainstream, many modest Muslimahs shed their clothes, hoping to make it BIG; they are hip, cool and very fashionable. Karadashian is not Muslim, she is of Armenian descent and practices Christianity. It doesn’t matter if you are talented, Kim isn’t. And now we have Rima. Both these women are very pretty no doubt about that, but it keeps coming back to their “sexiness.”

Spengler’s article “Rima Fakih and the fragility of Islam” hit me hard. The article’s premise is “a nation is never really beaten until it sells its women.” It is depressing to see them gloat over our “adoption the habits of the ambient culture.”

A conservative non-Muslim commented on it “As much as I’d like to celebrate this small victory [notice how this is a victory because some believe that Islam will fail, Ma'adhallah], I really can’t believe that Muslim parents reading about Ms. Fakih are terribly overjoyed at the prospect of their daughters becoming pole-dancers and strutting around in bikinis and lingerie… If Muslims in America are presented with a choice of whether to assimilate into larger American society as decadent secularists or remain segregated as pious Muslims, then my guess is they’ll choose the latter option more often than not.” He has more faith in us than I do. Maybe I have too many acquaintances who are rooting for Rima, who are viewing this as a victory, who are proud today to see a “new” image of Muslims.

I keep thinking I may not have a problem with any of this if Ms. USA’s religion wasn’t being made a center point. Well, maybe I would still have a problem as an American mom trying to raise kids with so much immodesty in our society- may be this can be something that Muslims, Christians, and Jews following their faith traditions can all agree on. Maybe we may not concur on how modesty should be practiced down to that last detail but we can agree to the upholding of decent, modest language and dress in the public arena, and speak out about the sexualization of women & girls. We could use this opportunity for interfaith dialogue and action.

Illume magazine’s article by Sister Carma calls it every American girl’s dream- I asked my daughter’s All-American Girl Scout troop what their dream is, what they want to become (my daughter is the only Muslim in the troop). They talked about becoming vets, candle store owners, authors, marine biologists, teachers, graphic designers and pediatric physical therapists, none of them said winning Miss USA.

Rima, I do not know you or what is in your heart and what action of yours Allah (SWT) loves. I can only make dua for you according to my beliefs; may Allah bless you with the love of modesty and haya so you cover the beautiful body that Allah gave you. I promise I will do my cheers for you when you graduate from law school.

P.S. Apparently Rima has declared she isn’t even really a Muslim. But that doesn’t really change the context of this post. The question is about role-models, and remains relevant whether Rima is a Muslim or not. (Removed. Information relating to this is quite vague, so we’ll not speculate)

For a real alternative to a “beauty pageant,” how about the Miss Beautiful Morals

Hidden Cameras..oh yea!

assalamu alaikum,

Well, few people know this, but I have a secret fantasy. No, no need to stop reading; it is completely G-rated, I assure you. Well, maybe PG at times.

I have a secret desire to have one of those hidden camera shows. Yea, and my best friend and I have discussed ideas to put on the show. We have some very hilarious ones that I've never seen before....not sure if I should reveal those just yet.

However, I did think of something funny yesterday. I was sitting at my friend's house eating dinner. My phone was sitting on the table, and the background pic is one of my new husband and I. One of her daughters walks up, looks at the phone, and says, "Who's that?" I said, oh it's just some guy I saw in a restaurant and took a pic with. I'm sorry, who do you think it would be? lol

That made me think, how funny would it be to see people's reactions if you were walking through a public place, walked up to a stranger, and leaned into them, saying, "smile!" and snapped a pic with them. Okay, it takes imagination to realize how funny that would be, but still...

Really....no, really?

Do you ever find yourself driving and oh, there's someone that wants to merge into traffic; so, as any normal/kind person would do, you slow down to allow them to merge, turn or whatever, and then it happens, or doesn't happen. That's right, I let her in front of me and she turns and drives on WITHOUT a thank you wave. Huh? Not even a slight nod of appreciation? I'm sorry, did you think I waited here all day to let you in front of me because it is my job? I'm sure it would never cross my mind to speed up and on Top of said people...that would just be atrocious of me. I have to say though that it annoys me even more when you hold the door open for people and they just walk right past you, especially if it is a man. Really...no, really?

My Path to Islam

Bismillah ir Rahman ir Raheem

Assalamu alaikum wa ramatuAllahi wa barakatuhu

Peace to non-muslim readers,

Growing up, the influence of religion was fairly strong in my life, but it was off and on. In my early years, I lived with my Mom, and while I don’t remember going to church, I do remember being baptized at around the age of six (so I assume I must have attended). When I was eight, my siblings and I went to live with our Father, as our Mom began having health problems. My Father was a Pentecostal minister, and I was made to go to church every Sunday. I was also forced to be baptized a second time, a re-baptism if you will, by my father. I guess the first time of being saved before God didn't take in his mind. But I digress, the Pentecostal service usually consisted of a very loud and energetic sermon, intermingled with singing. During the singing, the parishioners would begin waving their hands in the air, first one, then the second, then their bodies would start to sway, and by the end of the song, quite a few people were often shaking and even collapsing, due to the fact that (in their minds) the "Spirit of God" was moving through them. Also, a few would utter nonstop in "tongues", which to them is a language only God can understand that He sends through them. Even from the young age of 8, I remember thinking this is preposterous. However, despite my reticence at their worship, I never doubted the existence of Allah (God).

When I moved from my Father’s house at the age of 14 I stopped attending church; mainly because their beliefs (especially the Trinity) didn’t make sense and therefore didn‘t mean anything to me. I had always, as far as my memory serves, believed in God (Allah). Simply God; I had never called Him Jesus, as those around me did. I had always believed that Jesus, a.s., was a man alone. Try as they might, I was never convinced of the Trinity as the whole of God in three parts. To this day I have yet to hear an explanation for this that satisfies not only my curiosity, but simple reason.

As a teenager, I watched people pray before they’d eat, and they ended their prayers with, "In Jesus‘ name we pray;" I remember always being quite confused as to why they didn’t simply say in God’s name we pray. However, I never thought to look beyond that. I just assumed that I could pray to God and let them do whatever they want with their worship. I was as I believe many Christians are, simply accepting and not contemplative of the inconsistencies around them, without the drive to study and learn the thing that should be most important in their lives (unfortunately this habit is prevalent in all religions). Despite all of this, I still labeled myself Christian; though now I know that I did not hold the beliefs of one. In Actuality, I didn’t behave as most do either; I didn’t drink, do drugs, have premarital relations, or many of the other immoral acts that those not truly bound to their faith partake in.

The first time I met a Muslim I was eighteen and in college. I met and fell in love with a man from India. I didn’t know until a while after we met one another that he was a Muslim. I realized later this was because he didn’t act as a Muslim should, such as praying five times a day, fasting, etc. My ignorance of Muslims was such that the first thought that came to mind when he told me he was Muslim was of the movie, "Not Without my Daughter." I had Never met a Muslim before, and that is what I believed Muslims to be; the men: overbearing, abusive and sexist; and the women: subjugated, ignorant, forced to cover themselves with black clothes and without rights. I believe this is the view that many Americans had and still have of Muslims.

However, because I loved him dearly, I overlooked the fact that he was a Muslim; seeing as he didn’t act that much different than me. We continued talking and were soon engaged and then married. We had agreed before marriage that we would teach our future children both religions and when they came of age, they could decide which they believed and followed. What a truly ridiculous concept no matter what religion one believes. I mean really, if you're Jewish and a Christian couple (as example), do you really think teaching them both religions will give them a strong basis in EITHER religion? I mean, what they see then is that neither of their parents believe strongly enough in their religion to stand up for it as the right and only way. If you don't believe that your faith is the correct faith, then why are you following it to begin with?

Sorry, went off on another tangent, ironically, it was his lack of practice that led me to the Truth. One day, not but a few months after we were married, we were talking, and he told me that he felt it would be too much work to teach any children that we would have both religions, so I could just raise them as Christians. (This was speculation about future children; alhamdulillah I never had children with him.) Anyway, I hated that idea. Growing up, I had always wondered about my heritage. I knew I am part Native American with a mix of different European nationalities like French, Irish, and some Russian I think, but I didn’t really know about my background. Because of this, I always had a strong desire that my children know and be proud of who they are.

Consequently, I decided that if he didn't want to put forth the effort to teach our children their heritage, then I would learn about Islam so that I would know what to teach them. I read the Qur’an, and I studied a lot about the miracles and science of the Qur’an. The scientific discoveries that have only been discovered in recent times, such as: human reproduction (in detail), the formation of mountains (rooted into the earth), the creation of the universe, the formation of rain, and the miracle of the ant, to name a few.

It didn’t take long to realize that for a surety, the Qur’an is a book from Allah, because even taking the skeptics perspective, no matter if Muhammad, saaws, was well read and educated (which he wasn‘t), these things were not even thought of at the time the Qur’an was revealed. Further, since the Arabic Qur’an today is the same as the Arabic Qur’an over 1400 years ago, it is clear that Muhammad, saaws, is a Messenger of Allah and that Allah, swt, has promised that our book will never be changed.

When it came to accepting change in order to accept Islam in my heart, I faced a few stumbling blocks. Since I always believed in only one God, I had no problems with the oneness of Allah. I faced some uneasiness about giving up the concept of Jesus, a.s., being the son of God and dying for our sins, as that is drilled into a Christian’s head from the time they’re born. But after my husband talked to me (one of his few Islamic actions) and explained to me that Allah has no need for a son, and that Allah forgives sins and does not need a messenger like Isa, a.s, to do it, I completely agreed. It was all a matter of logic by that point, and that is the difficulty most have when learning about Islam. They usually have harsh feelings toward it already, or at least a resistance; so they have to be able to put that aside and think logically about the evidence before them in order to accept the truth. More can be said about this subject, but that's a topic of another blog altogether:).

The final issue that held me back from my Shahada (testimony of faith) was that of hijab. I still viewed it as oppressive to women and unnecessary. Once again, my husband’s lack of practice helped me, as he told me that hijab was not a requirement, and I didn’t have to wear it if I didn’t desire it. It is ironic that from the very beginning of our relationship really, his LACK of practice is what led me to Islam. SubhanAllah, it is true that Allah, swt, leads whom He wills and in His own ways as well.

In October of 1998, I took Shahada before my husband in our home. From then until three years later, I lived in a place where there were no Muslims. I taught myself, through the grace of Allah, about Islam. I learned how to pray and make wudhu from a book. I prayed alone and fasted alone. It took some time for me to become what I would even term a decent Muslim, one who does the fard; not until I abandoned the idea that my husband would lead me. After my conversion, the closer I became to Allah, the farther away he seemed to stray, and after 3 ½ years, our marriage ended in divorce. Almost immediately after the divorce, I put on the hijab (the cloth I always swore I’d never wear). That was over seven years ago, and Alhamdulillah I am still muhajibah; except now, it is something I wrap around myself from deep inside, not just a piece of cloth.